Last Day

2 Mar

Today was my last day working as an active duty naval officer.

I cried.

Not at first. I held it together all morning; when I first woke up and Ruby just wanted to snuggle; when she cried when I left; when the Commanding Officer presented me with a Navy Commendation Medal; when I walked out of the office for the very last time.

The first tears came when I got home and really realized that this was also Elise’s last day as Ruby’s nanny. I cannot describe in words how wonderful it has been to live with my sister this past year, and to always know that Ruby was being lovingly cared for by her auntie. We have always been pretty close, but this last year has really brought our relationship to a new level and I will always cherish this time we had together.

My second breakdown came at lunch with my coworkers. This past year has been absolutely the most challenging of my career, due entirely to one individual (technically my boss). I would not have made it without the support of my entire department, and especially my Chief Petty Officers. We all bonded over our mutual misery and I was able to keep going because I always knew they had my back. I am so very grateful to have served with them–it has truly been an honor.

But I am ready to move on.



4 Responses to “Last Day”

  1. Mary Jane Atwood March 3, 2012 at 5:55 am #

    I’m so proud of you.

  2. mynotsogerberbaby March 3, 2012 at 11:42 am #

    I took a while to respond to this blog and your “Advice from Ron Swanson” because at a year out, I am still dealing with the feelings I have with transitioning to being a homemaker.

    First, I love being home with Charlotte, and would not change a minute of the time and energy I have been able to devote to her and my husband over the last year for anything. But there are still days that I miss the Navy so much it hurts.

    I always knew when David and I had children that I wanted to be home with them, but I truly loved the “me” in the Navy. I find myself some days missing the adventure, the different work , and the travel, but I am loving the new adventures that motherhood has brought. I also knew I couldn’t handle doing both well. I would have been “half-assing” one of these roles, and I just wasn’t willing to let it be Charlotte.

    If I could offer any advice it would be to let yourself grieve a little….and not in a super melodramatic way, but this is a part of you that you are letting go, and that is hard. The days will be wonderful, spent with Ruby and because of how hard you have worked and the service you have given, you will be an even better mommy. But don’t try to suppress those twinges of sadness you’ll feel the next couple of weeks. Seek support, both from your husband and some of us that have walked in these shoes not all that long ago!

    I am so proud to have served in our Navy. I am proud to be a Navy wife. And I am very proud to be a Homemaker and a Mother. So let me be the first to welcome you to this group of amazing, accomplished and strong women! You’re going to fit right in!

  3. Congratulations!!! And, thank you for your service to our country!!!! I hope you consider the Naval Reserve as a way to get your retirement. I was in the Reserves for eight years. Good way to enjoy the Navy without the total sacrifice.

  4. Mariellen March 11, 2012 at 7:21 pm #

    i got choked up reading this…

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